The 2 Keys to Finding Your Purpose: Feelings & Fear

When it comes to finding your purpose, I used to always believe that saying “follow your bliss”. Now, not so much. At least not in a direct approach.

If you’ve ever wondered about a career change or what to actually do with your life, you may have been asked, “What makes you happy?” This question seems like it might point you in the right direction but it won’t really get you to the heart of your truest potential...what you're here on this earth to do.

More now than ever people are looking for more value in their lives. People want to make a difference...looking for ways to serve in a meaningful way while allowing them to earn their living. It’s less about the job and the money and more about the service and the fulfillment.

When I was at university studying Kinesiology, I knew there wasn’t a job this degree would provide me that would have me waking up every morning loving my life. So I left 2 years into my 4 year program and went to Massage Therapy College.

I believed that my love for alternative health and understanding the science behind our bodies was the key to my success and happiness in my career. And so I chose to become a massage therapist knowing there would be fulfillment from helping others while getting paid. It seemed like a win-win.

I wasn’t wrong. But I wasn’t exactly right either.

I loved my job and the people whom I had the honour of healing with my hands. But something was missing. I wasn’t sure what it was. All I knew was that I was too comfortable. I wasn’t growing.

I was very good at what I did. I had international clients that would fly in just to receive a massage from me. I constantly received rave reviews from clients. But here's where it gets tricky. One would think that if I was SO good at what I did, wouldn’t that make it the PERFECT profession? Isn’t that what we all strive for? To wake up every morning and not only love what we do but be incredibly amazing at it to boot?

I’m going to shake it up and tell you: not exactly.

While I was feeling super confident about my skills as a massage therapist, I was feeling really insecure about my body. I had one of the most INFLEXIBLE bodies compared to most people I knew. I was so ashamed of my inflexibility that instead of trying yoga to improve it, I avoided yoga out of fear of the judgment I might possibly receive (the judgment from myself was already a given). I never felt good enough to walk into a yoga class. So while I was continuously suggesting to my clients to practice yoga to assist in maintaining the health of their bodies, I hid behind the fear of my inflexibility and insufficiency, never letting anyone know that the shame of my own body was preventing me from practicing it myself.

For years this went on. Until I was able to shift my perspective. When I had gathered enough courage to walk into a yoga studio, I found a compassionate teacher who unknowingly helped me to discover that my inflexibility was a gift. When this shift happened, the fear and shame around my inflexible body began to dissolve. In fact, my body became my greatest teacher: showing me how to love myself.

As I continued to walk a path I had previously avoided out of fear, I uncovered a passion I never knew existed within me. Through the experiences, I learned how the inflexibility of our body and mind holds us back from expanding into our limitless potential. These experiences nudged me into something I had always wanted to do: write a book.

This book, Inflexible Me, became my greatest accomplishment not because people generally believe writing a book is a huge accomplishment but because it’s my manifestation of facing great fears resulting in great self-love. For that I will always be grateful. It's also opening the door to another great fear of mine: public speaking. As frightening as this is, it excites me even more. I now know what lies on the other side of fear. Purpose. Fulfillment. Joy.

Following your fears can lead you to places you never knew existed in your realm of possibility. Not once in my life did I ever believe I would become an author. The extent of my writing skills ended when high school did. Sometimes, the very thing we don’t know how to do or aren’t very good at will unlock the potentials we can’t yet see in ourselves. Throwing myself into a yoga class stripped me down to my most vulnerable state. Although I had clothes on, I stood on that mat naked. No one knew how deep that pool of fear and judgment I was daring to swim in was. I was alone. Until the compassionate teacher showed up.

Help will always show up when you dare to move into your fears. It’s where your greatness lies. Your choice to choose expansion will be supported because greatness is your birthright. Living small was never the plan for you.

If you’ve been wondering what your true purpose is then I suggest asking yourself what you fear the most. Be honest with yourself. Ask yourself how this fear makes you feel. Somewhere in there lies your answer. The only way to find out is to start digging. As Zig Ziglar says,

F-E-A-R has two meanings:
’Forget Everything And Run’
’Face Everything And Rise’
The choice is yours.

All you have to do is choose.

Love and expansion,